I've dated other races aside from black men—my first and only boyfriend of two years was Korean. "My parents, I should say, have never forbidden me from dating black men, or a man of any race, but their silence, more so my mother's, has been felt—it rendered each guy invisible.But I've never dated someone of my own ethnicity: Mexican. And I would say Colombian, but that courtship never blossomed into much after he came over my house and serenaded me with his acoustic guitar. Time and again, after being introduced to a black guy I was dating, my mother either let out heavy sighs or foretold my future under her breath. My dad used his seasonal, strictly temporary passport for work and came to Arizona to pick fruit.
Debora Hernandez, a senior at the University of California, Riverside stated, “As an individual you always want to please your parents and make them proud, but I have always been very independent and moved to the beat of my own drum.” Victoria Servin, an editorial-translator intern for Latinitas and Linguistics and Translation student at the University of Texas at El Paso, explains how she followed her mother’s wishes, “Personally I didn’t want a boyfriend in high school so it didn’t really bother me too much.
I never really felt the need to rebel against my parents and I didn’t do it out of spite, I guess I just agreed.” In Mexico, your family is your biggest dating pressure.
When asked about dating in high school at a young age, Victoria Servin stated, “My mother didn’t want me to have a boyfriends because she didn’t want me to fall under the hispanic teen pregnancy statistic. On the other hand, some parents are less eager to want to meet every person their daughter dates.
She wanted me to go to school, or travel, she didn’t want me to date anyone.” Today the Mexican-American culture is really not much different from other cultures in the U. Like all concerned parents, my parents did have some influence over who I dated. Servin comments, “Most mexican moms want to know who you go out with, my mom doesn’t want to meet anyone; I think it’s because no matter who I date, it’s not going to be good enough.” Today, women are also seen as more independent and as the breadwinners of the house.
My mom knew her father wouldn't approve either way. She knew if she wanted to be with my dad, she'd have to runaway with him. Despite not knowing she was pregnant with my older brother at the time, she hid in a bunk in the back of my father's van and they crossed the border together.
They settled in a largely Mexican neighborhood in San Jose, California.And, really, it roots deeper than my parents, my grandparents, and their parents before them.Racial tension between Mexicans and blacks, especially on the west coast and in some parts of the south, is tied to an ugly history.While I've dated other races, I'm mostly attracted to black men.My eyes and heart tend to steer me in that direction.It may have been like this a long time ago specifically for our grandparents and great-grandparents during a time where things were more traditional, and the world wasn’t so modern.