He said that Dick got all serious at the roast of Hefner and thanked him for having courage back when no one was bringing in blacks and minorities. Howard said it's kind of a bad way to start the program in Cocktober.
Howard had a clip he played of Dick talking about Hef.
Fred did his impression of Ronnie talking about how he loves mud flaps and piss flaps. Howard said Benjy went into the pool there and took off all his clothes. He didn't even see the guy and the guy didn't stop. Howard had a clip from an interview he did with him. Scott said he went through all of the playmates one year. Howard took a call from fake Bill Maher clips and they had him talking about his experiences there at the Playboy mansion. Howard played a clip of one of the guys going out on the street asking a woman to pretend to be Jenny Mc Carthy talking about Hugh Hefner dying. They played a phony phone call the guys made to an internet radio show as Mrs. Robin read a story about Derek Jeter being the owner or one of the owners of the Miami Marlins.
Howard said he wrote back to Jimmy talking about Ronnie and Jimmy wrote back about how impressed he is with Ronnie talking about wanting a pussy. Howard said it wasn't a big thing to do that to a limo. Howard said he must have said ''This is fucking awesome.'' Robin said he must have thought it was something no one else had. Ronnie read more of the eulogy and said he's reading like a 2nd grader. Howard said they asked him to do this and he's doing it so leave him alone. Ronnie said it's the light shining through the paper. He had him read more but he was having such a hard time getting through it. Fred kept goofing on him and made up more stuff he could have said. Trump said that he's going to divert funds form Puerto Rico to the displaced Playmates. Howard said all month long they'll be celebrating Cocktober with games, songs and guests. Howard said they're the only ones celebrating all month long. Howard said he will be coming in one day later this month. Robin said he's also feuding with the Secretary of State about what to do with North Korea.Howard said he wrote to Jimmy about the Ronnie pussy thing and they went back and forth talking about that. Howard said he has never seen a guy with so much Playboy stuff on his car. Howard asked what women did when he had that stuff on his car. Howard asked what his statement was with the Playboy stuff. He said they had napkins inside glasses with the logo on it. Howard asked Ronnie if he had the mud flaps put on by someone. He said it's the garage where he has his cars serviced. Howard said it's one thing if he was crying and can't read it. Ronnie read more about Hef and lost his place again. Howard asked how he reads road signs out there on the road. Ronnie read more of his eulogy and still had a hard time reading it. Fred played a Godfather movie clip where Luca Brasi was reading a note he wrote to Don Corleone. Howard took a call from a guy who said he works with 1st graders who put more thought into their poems. Howard took a call from Bobo who told Ronnie not to compare his stuff to his. Howard took a call from a guy who told him to leave Ronnie alone. Howard talked about how there are homeless playmates. Howard let the clips of Trump go a short time later. Howard said Benjy doesn't get naked on the show anymore. He said Rob Lowe told a story about how crazy things would get there. Howard played a song parody that Daniel Mendelson did for Cocktober. Robin said Rex Tillerson had to be talked out of resigning this summer. Robin read about the Equifax breaches and how a lot of personal information was stolen. Fake Underdog Lady announcing they have Sarah Silverman coming in today. Howard played a clip of him calling into the Kathy radio show and teaching her how to say I am filled with courage by saying ''Pumping Robin's back door.'' He had some other things he had Kathy repeat after him. Lee had Howard learn to say Happy Cocktober by saying ''Pussylips is-a-gross.'' Howard said it's easy to learn when you teach like that. The guy said it's about an hour and they have a lot of various people come to the show. Howard said Bruce should come in and do that there. Howard said he got a note saying he performs 15 songs. Howard said he likes how Miley did it, there and just for him. am Show opening bits and songs included: A Baba Booey song parody, a phony phone call to an internet radio show using clips of Howard talking about his parents, Peter Frampton performing ''Baby, I Love Your Way'' in the Howard Stern Show studio. He said that he calls the Kathy radio show and teaches her Japanese phases. Lee said he has the cast of Naked Boys Singing (Naked Boys Singing.com) there with him today. Howard asked who their audience is and how long it is. Howard said he'd tell moms who don't look so good to look at Miley's mom. Howard said Miley mentioned her mother likes to smoke weed. Howard said he's used to having a concert in the studio like he had today. Howard said he's seen him at a few things but he never does talk to him much. Robin said there's always something going on in the hills in the country. Howard asked if anyone cares that Jeff the Drunk stopped smoking. Howard said he's not going to sit through 4 hours of show.
They played a song parody about Fred for Cocktober. Howard said he really doesn't want to go to the Springsteen show. He said he's sure that there are a lot of other celebrities there.Howard said they're going to carry on this morning but they're thinking about the people in Las Vegas. Howard said he put naked women in there and he was very pro-sexuality. Howard said there were porn magazines before but it wasn't like Playboy. Howard tried to find the email but he was having a hard time. Then the guys sang their song ''See Our Dicks.'' Howard sang with them too. Howard gave them some plugs and let them go after that. Howard said if they're stories from the book then he already knows them. Gary said he did hear they were excerpts from the book.Howard said they're also thinking about Hugh Hefner. He said he had good interviews and it was sort of nice. Howard said he read nice things about him for the most part. He said he had black entertainers working his clubs and things like that. He said that they had classy photographs in Playboy. He said the first time Ronnie picked him up he had a limo with Playboy mud flaps on it. Robin said if he put them in folders it should be there. JJ said he didn't really know it until he got into porn. Howard said he's sure that they have no listeners left now. Howard told Gary to escort Robin out of there immediately. Fred had a live version of the song that he pulled out. Robin read a story about Hugh Hefner's cause of death being a heart attack.Howard asked if he wanted to come in and say something about Hugh Hefner. Howard said he and Jimmy Kimmel talked about that over email. Robin said Howard is like the guys at gambling tables who don't have money but they have a system. Fred and Robin were doing their impressions of Ronnie too. Howard said at their highest point they sold their own clothing and jewelry. Howard said they had casinos and had radio shows and movies. Howard took a call from a guy who said he's going to be boycotting the show like conservatives boycott the NFL. Robin said she's not sure what Fred's favorite group is. Robin said she's going to say ''Maybe I'm Amazed'' or ''Something in the Way She Moves.'' Howard said she's wrong. Howard said this was playing the first time he made out with Fred in Hartford. Howard said the hairs on the shaft of his penis are standing up from the song. He did a live commercial read and went to break after that. Howard said he may have to get her in there at some point. She said it was her favorite thing she's ever done. He was also saying that they're doing a great job down there.Ronnie came in and Howard asked if he heard any shit about the pussy talk last week. Howard said Jimmy has a 53 percent win rate and he says if he had that kind of win rate in Vegas he'd be banned. He said he wrote back to Jimmy about the Dancing with the Stars stuff and talked about some of the dancers. Howard said Hef died right after Ronnie talked about his fantasy of having a pussy. Howard kept going with the impression and said he might need the week off to remember Hugh Hefner. Howard said that his first TV show was called Playboy's Penthouse and then Playboy After Dark. Howard said it was nice having the guy bang the gong with his cock. He said that they know it's going to be entertaining but they cringe just hearing about it. Howard asked Fred what the greatest rock love song is. Howard said the greatest love song is actually ''Thank You'' by Led Zeppelin. Howard asked Fred to play the Chris Cornell version. Howard said the Naked Boys are all making out right now. Robin said she's reading lists out there and no one agrees with him. Robin said Geraldo Rivera was also down there in Puerto Rico. Lee told him to say ''Show-me-big-cock'' is how you say Cocktober has 31 days. One of the guys was talking about the show they do and where they do it. Howard thanked Tish for coming in and said she has to come back. Howard said he and Beth had a great night last night. Howard said she's very nice and always swallows her vomit after he's on top of her. Howard said he hopes they do it and don't fuck it up. Howard said Arsenio could have transitioned into a woman or something like that. Robin said the playlist isn't that long from what she saw.